Comments on: I messed up: Should I resign or wait to be fired?

By: Another Evil HR Director

Another Evil HR Director — Thu, 20 Sep 2012 22:48:39 +0000

Another good response! Although, I’m not getting the “harassment” angle. One incident does not harassment make. And, there’s nothing in this post that indicates harassment. Really, really bad behavior, yes; but not harassment.

By: fposte

fposte — Tue, 18 Sep 2012 22:33:06 +0000

In reply to Evil HR Lady. Good point about the state variability, and also about the "it never hurts to apply."

By: Naomi

Naomi — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 21:38:16 +0000

Ah the wonders of HR and not knowing all the facts!
On the other side of this if a manager came to me and said ‘I’ve got a staff member who lost the plot and swore at their colleague and threw something at them.’ I’d be asking questions to find out if there’s a history of this sort of behaviour. I would hold meetings with both parties to find out what happened – OP apologies and just stick to the facts – I’d then hold a disciplinary with the manager and the OP and a decision would be made from there.
Based on what I see, and employment law where I live I’d most probably be looking at a written or final written warning if there’d been no previous history, I might also see if it’s possible for the OP to go to a training on dealing with stress or an anger mangement course.

By: Evil HR Lady

Evil HR Lady — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 13:22:52 +0000

In reply to fposte. Depending on the state, it may or may not be considered a "cause." Some states are extremely generous. I advise everyone to apply, even if they were fired for cause.

By: Evil HR Lady

Evil HR Lady — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 13:21:40 +0000

In reply to Bridgette. Oh, I hate the "I'm sorry IF I offended you" too. Blech.

By: Evil HR Lady

Evil HR Lady — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 13:20:48 +0000

In reply to Charles.

I used the phrase “screwed up,” editors changed it to “messed up.” The OP said, “Urgent help needed!”

Leaving the “but” out of an apology is really hard to do.

By: Evil HR Lady

Evil HR Lady — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 13:19:10 +0000

In reply to SunnyCA. It's always better to be classy. Klassy, on the other hand, not so much.

By: fposte

fposte — Mon, 17 Sep 2012 04:04:44 +0000

In reply to Edith. This would be a firing for cause, which precludes you from collecting unemployment in most places.

By: Edith

Edith — Sun, 16 Sep 2012 17:55:50 +0000

In some cases, is being fired not preferable to resigning?
Collecting unemployment benefits for a while can help the burned-out recover without risking foreclosure, etc.
Thanks – excellent column

By: Bridgette

Bridgette — Fri, 14 Sep 2012 17:21:28 +0000

In reply to Charles. Fake apologies are the bane of my existence (one of them, anyway). Even worse is the "I'm sorry IF I offended you" approach, placing the blame on the person for being offended. It's like telling a racist or sexist joke and criticizing the person who doesn't laugh for being uptight.