Are there staff you really don’t need?

Four cannibals apply for a job in a big corporation…

“Well“, says the boss, „if I hire you guys, you have to promise to not eat any of our staff.“

The cannibals promise that they will not eat anyone and get hired.

Everything is going well for a while, and one day the boss calls them into his office.

“You’re working well and all, but we’re missing an office cleaner. Do you have something to do with that?”

The cannibals swear that they are innocent.

The boss believes them and leaves the office and they all turn to their leader.

“You idiots!”, he screams. “Who ate the cleaner?”

One of the cannibals sheepishly raises his hand.

“You fool!”, shouts the leader. “For weeks, we’ve been feasting on directors, team leaders, project managers, and human resource staff, and then you go and eat someone they’ll actually miss!”


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6 thoughts on “Are there staff you really don’t need?

  1. I supported a CEO 15 years ago. A RIF meeting was held with senior management. Two of the new owners supported eliminating some of the high earners and questioned why these employees should receive outplacement support. As a former employee in Executive Outplacement, I couldn’t help but think; these two have no clue (wealthy/privileged).

    In another privately held global organization. The cleaning crew was fired. A C-level executive hired a woman who worked in the Shipping and Receiving Dept. to clean the offices daily following her shift and before 5:00 p.m. closing time… She no doubt needed the money, but I thought it was in bad form. Was I wrong to feel this way?

    1. That sounds like a form of nepotism, in giving the job to a certain individual who was not obviously a professional cleaner, but also a form of abuse, too, because there was no way the cost of the “extra” pay for the cleaning was worth the overtime pay. Plus someone was designating that cost to some slush fund. Eliminating a specific cleaning crew is one thing, but every company needs proper cleaning maintenance –by OSHCA standards alone.

      1. Precisely. I doubt there was any favoritism in the selection of this employee. She was likely paid less than a professional cleaning person.

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