My Last Thoughts on Alcohol

I get more questions about DUIs, public drunkenness and other similar problems than anything else. I’m not an expert in this area and I think I’ve pretty much said all that there is to say about it. As such, I’m not going to answer any more questions regarding “oh no, I have a DUI! Do I have to tell a prospective employer?” unless it’s a really interesting question that will cause tons of people to link to me, thus increasing my hit count.

It’s all about my needs.

But, here are my last thoughts.

  • Driving while under the influence (of alcohol or other substance) is illegal and dangerous. And stupid. I know, you were young and you were dumb and now you are so mature, blah, blah, blah, blah. I lack sympathy. Don’t do it. And don’t blame your decision to drive on your impaired state. Before you got impaired you were planning to drive. Why didn’t you make arrangements before you got plastered?
  • Yes, you have to list it on your application if they ask.
  • Yes, it will come up in a background check.
  • Yes, it can affect your chances of getting a job, even if it doesn’t directly involve driving. It demonstrates exceedingly poor judgment.
  • If you have just one conviction and it was years ago, it probably won’t hurt your chances of getting a job where driving is not required.
  • Yes, you can petition to get your record expunged–in some states and in some circumstances. Good luck with that.
  • And on the general alcohol front, just because they serve alcohol at a company party (or at a party where co-workers and bosses happen to be), does not mean you can get drunk. You can’t. It will affect how others think of you.
  • This includes your co-worker’s wedding. Sure, toast the bride and groom with the champagne provided, but let the bride’s brother be the drunken fool at the party, not you. Your career depends on it.
  • Recovering from public drunkenness that happened in front of your boss is extremely difficult.
  • This applies even if your boss is plastered.
  • Did I mention you should never, ever, ever, drink and drive? Don’t. I prefer that my family and friends and I arrive alive at our destinations, so please don’t do it.
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    4 thoughts on “My Last Thoughts on Alcohol

    1. Yes. I concur.

      This applies to a lot of matters that are technically private but speak to your self-control and judgment. The name Bill Clinton ring a bell?

      Smart guy, probably loads of fun to hang with, piss-poor judgment that makes me think poorly of him years later. Wasn’t even related to his job, directly.

    2. Most common driving impairment?

      Lack of sleep.

      Do employers think of this when they insist on overtime for people with long commutes?
      Better to send them home in a cab than face the grieving family’s lawyer.

      Do employees think of this before switching off the TV at night or doing one last load of laundry?

      Given the number of impaired drivers on the road at any hour, we should!

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