Judging by the number of articles on the internet right now about how everyone is too dumb to survive the solar eclipse without going blind, I expect that by this afternoon, most of the population will need to visit an ophthalmologist. If only I had known about this back when I was choosing my career path, I could have gone to medical school and starting later today I could be filthy rich.
In addition to everyone becoming blind, apparently, we are going to go broke as well. Outplacement firm, Challenger, Gray & Christmas, estimated that the eclipse will cost businesses around $700 million dollars. I’m sure they did this calculation for the press, which they’ve gotten in spades. I’m happy to help share the news.
And the cat thing? I was only partially joking. I’ve seen numerous warnings to keep your pets inside because they will go blind as well. Newsflash: You would have to take your pet and force the poor thing to stare at the sun. Animals aren’t quite so stupid as we make them out to be.
To keep reading, click here: Today’s Solar Eclipse Will Blind You, Destroy Your Business and Steal Your Cat.