You Didn’t Ask Me, but You Should Have

Another confession–I regularly read the letters posted at Dr. Laura’s website. They are sometimes interesting, but usually amusing. Today I wanted to bang my head on my desk as I read a letter from a woman who is returing to the work force after being a stay at home mother for the past 8 years.

Getting a professional job after an 8 year lapse is difficult. I agree. The writer complained that some agencies wouldn’t work with her because of the lapse. So, she decided to write a nontraditional letter explaining why she was gone. A quote:

If you consider me “brain-dead” because I was a homemaker and mother, than I do not want to work for you. You obviously have no idea what type of organizational skills, and multi-tasking it takes to raise such a large family. If you consider what I did to be honorable, and a wise choice, than we need to talk.

Aiyee! I’m a strong proponent of staying home with your children. Most of my friends quit their jobs when they had their first baby. My mother was out of the workforce for about 15 years. I work part time in order to maximize time with the offspring (although, ironically, I’m letting her watch Clifford while I write this). But, I would throw this woman’s resume in the trash without even looking at it.


Because she’s confrontational and has the clear expectation that hiring managers don’t respect stay at home mothers. Plus, she gives way too much information. Another snippet:

The biological mother of the 5 children decided line-dancing and boyfriends were more important than raising her kids. She abandoned them.

We gained full custody of all 5 children. We haven’t seen the mother since.

How tragic, but how inappropriate for a cover letter. I don’t want to know that even after I’ve known you for several months. That’s something you would tell me after we are friends, not before I interview you.

At first, I thought her idea to be upfront about why she’d been out of the workforce was wise–don’t pretend you’ve been employed when you haven’t been. But, my goodness lady, don’t be so rude!

And next time, come to Evil HR Lady with your employment dilemmas. Not Dr. Laura. I’m just as mean and I have no commercial interruptions.

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5 thoughts on “You Didn’t Ask Me, but You Should Have

  1. I certainly wouldn’t want to work with this woman. What a way to introduce yourself–insult the interviewer. No wonder she’s having trouble finding a job.

    Brain-dead is right.

  2. This line in the penultimate paragraph was a gem:

    “I will place pictures of my family at my desk so I’ll require a large work space.”

  3. Yeah, and she’s going to blame people for being insensitive to mothers who left the work force to raise children, when the real reason she won’t have a job is that she’s a pushy jerk.

  4. She also has a typo “than I do not want to work for you.”

    Proofread those cover letters!

  5. I have just started reading your blog and am addicted (enough to go into the archives hehe) but I am apalled by this letter! OMG how combative and the line re: the pictures at the desk is unbelievable.

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